Taking a break

 As another few months has passed since I've written anything for this blog I feel like I should post an update. At the moment I don't feel like there is anything I particularly want to write about without it feeling like I'm writing just for the sake of it. I hope that this blog has been helpful or maybe even enjoyable for people to read but I don't want it to become a chore for me. It may be that down the line I get inspired and update it again but for now I think I'm going to take a definitive break from it. 

Thanks for reading,

James

Hello again

 Well I will once again apologise for having a long gap between updates but that said I had been without a working laptop for a while due to the one I had been using giving up the ghost and not being able to purchase a laptop that I wanted due to a lack of availability. I now have an Acer Aspire 5 which is much slimmer, faster and overall better than my old laptop. I also don't have to rush to plug it in after 30 minutes of use! I have also had less time on my hands due to being back at work. I started back in July and I have to say it has been good being back at work rather than being stuck at home feeling guilty about not being able to do proper work. The lab has social distancing measures in place along with hand sanitisers at each of the buildings. It did take a while to adjust back into things but things are fairly normal at the moment but just with a far lower volume of regular samples being brought in and our lab manager has had difficulty being able to purchase certain items that we need for our lab due to everyone needing them for covid testing. Our lab is involved in some covid work but the samples are inert and only a couple of my colleagues are involved in it.

Obviously with the pandemic there isn't a lot else happening. We did go away for a week up the North coast but we only ate out a total of three times and in each case we were comfortable with the social distancing and procedures in place. It was more for a change of scene and getting out for walks. We also went on a boat trip out from Ballycastle along the coast which was great.  I am volunteering as a dog walker at the animal sanctuary still but there is social distancing in place and also a rota system in place. My brother and his girlfriend did get a puppy which has been a lovely boost to our family. We have had lots of fun and entertainment from him and he has helped boost all our moods.

In more TCS related news I made the mistake of letting my BAHA headband get far too stretched and loose. I could hear fine for the most part but struggled when it came to watching TV etc. I recently found out about a woman who makes her own BAHA headbands as an alternative to the Cochlear and Oticon ones so I decided to buy one. My hearing has definitely improved due to the tighter fit but I've been impressed with the headband so far and will probably do a blog update of its own about it.

That's all for now,

James

Strange Times Part 3

Well we are over a month on and things remain pretty much the same for me. I continue to work from home and I feel like I should be a super employee once I return to work having done training courses in problem solving, time management, team-work, Excel, Word, communication, safety etc. etc. I've now moved on to working on rewriting the laboratory's Standard Operating Protocols for the various processes that we carry out. Our lab manager has set out various risk assessments and safety protocols for those working in the lab at the moment so hopefully when I do return to working on site it will be as safe as possible.

I haven't had much time to write outside of working hours recently due to spending a lot of time doing research to help with purchasing decisions. My parents have decided to use this time to negotiate new internet and TV deals given we were out of contract and paying far too much for both. We did a lot of research on whether to switch providers and/or potentially get one of the very good bundle deals but we decided to stick with our current providers and get better packages. As a result we are getting very sizeable upgrades in both for less than they were paying before. Given that we will be getting access to ultra HD content we also decided that it was probably time to upgrade our 13 year old plasma TV which is only HD ready i.e. not full HD. I did a quick bit of research and found what seemed like a great TV for our budget and being the same reliable brand. My parents went and looked at it and thought it seemed good, only for me to do a bit more research and discover that there was a major issue with viewing angles. This is an issue because of the way our living room is set out. I was a bit sceptical until I saw the TV in person and it really was an issue. Given that my parents didn't want to splurge on an OLED or QLED TV we decided the best option was to go with one which had an IPS screen which is better for viewing angles but not as good if you watch movies in a dark room which we generally don't do. Unfortunately it seems like everyone is buying TVs at the moment so we struggled to get the one we originally wanted however we have now ordered one which seems to be slightly better but for a good price. I'm very excited to get everything up and running!

That's all for now. Take care,

James

Strange Times Part 2

So I'm now approaching the nine week mark of being in this shutdown/off work. I have to say it was nice having plenty of relaxation time combined with some lovely weather. That said from the start of last week I've had to start doing some work from home in order to satisfy senior staff members. This has included online training courses and carrying out a literature search for our lab manager. It isn't the most exciting work and it is difficult to work from home both in terms of getting back into the mindset but also being in a house with my parents who are going about their business and can't be expected to tip toe around.

I think we are fortunate in a way in terms of the technology available to us in this pandemic. I've had a number of group chats and quizzes with friends including people living in England and another living in America. I haven't run out of physical books yet but when I do I have a kindle so I'll be able to download e-books. I also have a library card which has allowed me to download books and more importantly guitar magazines onto my tablet for free which is brilliant. In terms of TV the lack of football is rather strange but we have the guilty pleasure of watching an episode of the show American Pickers while we have our lunch. We have also just finished the most recent season of Better Call Saul on Netflix. In terms of personal viewing I finally finished watching all of the Netflix Marvel shows with Jessica Jones season 3. I persisted with Arrow and watched it until the very end (and I'm glad I did) and I'm continuing to keep up with The Flash (much improved this season) and Supergirl (may drop it). I decided to stop watching Legends of Tomorrow because it just got a bit too silly for me and I haven't given Batwoman a chance as I haven't been fussed on what I have seen on it. In terms of games I got Jedi Knight: Fallen Order as a birthday present which was very good. I'm now playing through Red Dead Redemption 2 which is great but also a real time sink as there is just so much to see and do!

In terms of other activities I haven't played as much guitar or drums as I probably should have though I'm trying to make more of an effort to actually learn songs on guitar rather than just messing about. I'm kinda glad I'm not taking lessons especially on drums at the moment because I don't think doing it via video calls would work for me. Given that I plan to move out eventually I thought it would be a good idea to get some cooking practice and so with some assistance from my mum I have made one meal a week for the three of us for the last six weeks (including this week). Part of it as been finding new recipes and so far I've made Chicken Schwarma (middle eastern inspired spicy chicken) with garlic and herb potato wedges, Nando's inspired peri-peri chicken (twice) also with potato wedges, "Italian" meat loaf with mashed potato, carrots and brocolli, herb crusted chicken with a creamy sauce with roast potatoes and vegetables and sticky sesame chicken with rice.

Obviously there are lots of talks about the shutdown easing and it's hard not to be a bit impatient but at the same time you don't want to rush back too soon. I think it will be a good while before things are back to normal.

Thanks for reading,

James

The poor sound quality of TV shows and movies

It seems to be a regular complaint both online and in newspapers about the poor sound quality of TV shows or movies or to be more accurate the inaudibility of what characters are actually saying. This can be due to a number of issues such as poor audio mixing and actors speaking "naturally" aka mumbling. It shouldn't be an issue in the cinema with a properly set up sound system though sometimes they can be too loud even for a cinema. At home many people buy sound bars or surround sound systems to get better sound quality from their TVs but these don't solve all the issues. I live with my parents and we have a surround sound system for our main TV which is great if we are all watching TV at the same time. It's not so great if one person is watching the TV and the others are doing other things and are getting disturbed by the high noise levels. There is a regular issue with shows and movies having whisper level dialogue only for an action scene to suddenly pump up the volume. This has been a problem with trying to watch movies at home as you have to keep constantly putting the volume up and down.

I'm not sure exactly when but I eventually gave up and started to use subtitles when watching TV by myself. It means I can actually sit and enjoy what I'm watching rather than be worried that it's far too loud or having to constantly increase and decrease the volume. It can be a bit hit and miss at times, on Sky TV the subtitles aren't always 100% accurate and there is also this annoying thing where they take a few seconds to kick in after you have fast forwarded through adverts or paused so you have to account for that in order to not miss anything. The subtitles on Netflix are great especially since they are just plain white readable text and they immediately show up unlike with Sky.

Obviously subtitles have some disadvantages due to their nature of appearing before dialogue is actually spoken so potentially spoiling a surprise or a joke but I think people should be more open minded about them. They are not as distracting as you might think and they take the stress of worrying about volume levels and not being able to enjoy a show because you are struggling to hear what characters are actually saying. Being open minded about subtitles also opens the door to enjoying shows or movies in a foreign language such as the recent Oscar winner Parasite (which I haven't managed to see yet). A few months ago we watched Narcos on Netflix of which large parts of the dialogue are in Spanish. You quickly get used to it and it doesn't detract from enjoying the show.

Of course one other option if you are watching by yourself is headphones or in my case streaming audio either through my Cochlear mini mic via a standard audio cable or through my Cochlear phone clip via Bluetooth directly to my hearing aid. I've found that I usually don't need subtitles when I do that and I can mute the mics on my BAHA's so I am only getting the audio from whatever is streaming to them. Though I do get a bit paranoid about having the volume up too high sometimes, I really don't want to add tinnitus onto my list of medical issues! There is also the issue of it being a drain on the BAHA batteries and having the phone clip or mini mic charged and ready to go. When I eventually move out I may look into purchasing a TV streamer accessory that would just sit near the TV and be able to be plugged in for electricity.

As with the complaints about THAT Game of Thrones episode where you could barely see anything I think the people who make TV shows and movies need to remember that at the end of the day people just want to be able to clearly see and hear what is going on without having to sit in a dark room with a large expensive TV or having an expensive sound system that is perfectly set up. I'm also sure actors would like to for the effort they put in to be worth it with people actually being able to hear and understand what is being said.

Thanks for reading,

James

Strange times

Well these are certainly strange times it hasn't even been six months since I started working at my job and now I'm back to being at home all day. I unfortunately had to make the decision to take responsibility for my own health and indeed that of my parents who I live with to no longer go to work. I am grateful that my manager and indeed her boss are both understanding and I have a letter from my GP to satisfy senior staff as to why I'm not at work. As part of having Treacher Collins Syndrome I have a narrow airway and for the most part it does not affect my day to day life but given the risk that the Coronavirus poses and the fact that it is a respiratory illness I did not feel I could continue working. Given the nature of the work I do it is impossible for me to work from home as I need expensive and large laboratory equipment to carry out my work not to mention working with bacteria and hazardous chemicals. I found out towards the end of last week that the lab I work in has actually been shut down but the site where I work hasn't so apparently my colleagues who are still in work have been moved to other departments on a temporary basis.

So at the moment things are very uncertain, I have no idea when I will be able to go back to work. I'm also unable to volunteer at the animal sanctuary as only staff members are allowed in at the moment. I really hope that people follow the government instructions and limit the spread of infection but that said I've been going out for long walks to get fresh air and exercise and have come across people who clearly don't understand the concept of social distancing. My plan is to take things day by day and try to enjoy the unexpected downtime but also try and use it in a positive or productive way. Hopefully as part of that I will be able to write more for this blog.

Keep safe,

James

Working 9-5 Part 2

Yes I know it is yet another long period between posts! That said when you are working full time and then have the busy build up to Christmas then there isn't much time or energy for blog writing. That said I am delighted to announce that I've now been made permanent! I had been going through the recruitment process for the organisation on a permanent basis which had started back in the summer. I had to do an aptitude test, then there was an eligibility shift (for some reason they look at your qualifications after doing the test) before an interview. The interview took place in November which worked out well for me because by then I was already working there under the same job title but on a temporary basis. However competition for the limited number of positions was very high and despite already working there and the great feedback I got from the interview I did not make the initial list. Unfortunately due to the formal writing of the letter letting me know this and my past experience I assumed the worst and that it would be unlikely that I would get the job on a permanent basis. This was especially unfortunate as I found out on the day I was going up the north coast for a weekend away with my parents and it rather soured my mood! I was eventually able to meet with a senior staff member who clarified the situation, that I was in a good position on the waiting list and would hopefully have some good news in the new year. This made me feel a lot better but unfortunately due to being an agency worker I only accumulated half a day's holiday every week I worked and not only that but I had to book any week day off even mandatory holidays like Christmas. When it came to Christmas I ended up taking a few days as unpaid rather than go back to work so soon (there was some work to do but nothing that had to be done). Before Christmas I got an email saying that I had been sent an offer letter for the job but of course when I asked if they could just email me it they said no and that I would have to wait but with it being Christmas it would probably be a while. Long story short a few days after Christmas I got the offer letter for the position on a permanent basis however it didn't give any information as to where exactly I would be working and if I would be staying in the lab I had been working. It was only after my supervisor got back after Christmas that I got clarification that yes I would be staying where I was and that I definitely had the job on a permanent basis. By that point it was a bit of an anticlimax!

It's a major relief to have gotten the job on a permanent basis. I would be lying if I said it is my dream job but I there are some great benefits, I like the people I work with, the commute isn't too bad and it is a great organisation to get experience in. Since I've been made permanent I've started to get trained up on other processes in the lab which has added more variety to the week. It's hard not to get a bit nostalgic for my PhD though, when I was working with plant material I didn't have to worry so much about contaminating samples with anything from myself! It's also a bit different working in a shared lab, I'm still learning about where certain things are stored and what the processes are for ordering consumables etc. At the moment all our samples are collected by other people but apparently we will be collecting some of our own samples in the summer months so will have a chance to get out and about so I'm looking forward to that after missing the sampling of my PhD.

Thanks for reading,

James

Working 9-5

Well it has been a while since I've written anything for this blog and to be honest I've considered giving it up. That said in the past few weeks I've actually had a genuine reason not to be writing since I've actually got a job! The thing is that it is actually through a recruitment agency and it is only for 3 months at the moment however there is potential for it to be extended and I also have an interview with the same organisation for a permanent position next month. It's great to have finally gotten something and even if it does turn out to be temporary I am earning money and getting great experience to put on my CV and help with future interviews as well.

It has been adjustment going from getting up at after 9am and spending some time in the morning looking at jobs etc. (unless I had an interview coming up and was preparing for that) to getting up early, driving to work and working all day. That said I think I've done rather well so far. I've managed to get up at 7am without too much trouble though I am now using both the alarm on my phone and a Sonic Boom all in one vibrating pad that goes under my pillow and clips onto it to keep it in place. I'm not going to go into any detail about what I'm doing but it feels great to be back in a lab again doing productive and important work. It does get quite physical at times though in terms of having to lift heavy crates with bottles in them so hopefully will build up some muscles!

It all happened very fast and it was a bit of a shock to apply for the job, get a phone call a couple of days later asking some basic questions and then getting told a couple of days later that I basically had got the job and I didn't have to interview or anything for it. After all the effort that I've put into applying for jobs and going for interviews it was hard not to be a bit skeptical! There wasn't a great deal of info provided about the lab I would actually be working in. Me and my employment advisor sent some emails back and forth to them but there was a bit too much focus on noise levels (we wanted to make sure it wasn't a super noisy lab since that wouldn't be suitable for me with my hearing). In the end we organised to go up and have a meeting with the people I would actually be working for and see the lab. That went well and I ended up accepting the job.

In terms of other news there isn't really any. My bilateral BAHAs are working well, I'm sure there are probably some tweaks that could be made to improve the settings slightly but I'm happy with them. I do find the issue with feedback whenever I wear a hood extremely irritating though. I'll either have to suck it up or make sure I have an umbrella with me if it is raining or likely to rain.

Thanks for reading!

James

Cyprus 2019

It's hard to believe that I've been home several weeks now since being away on holiday with my parents to Cyprus. We had left it quite late as usual to book anything and decided to return to Cyprus many years after our last visit mainly due to availability and the fact it was cheaper than a lot of the Spanish countries (Majorca etc.) We ended up staying in a small town called Polis which we hadn't stayed in before. We stayed in a hotel in quite a large apartment. My parents got the bedroom and I got the sofa bed in the main living area. The apartment was basic but nice, the only thing was that there was no air conditioning in the living area so we had to rent a fan from the hotel. It did help at night when trying to sleep though I woke up most nights with a very dry mouth (advantage of taking my hearing aid off at night is that I couldn't hear it!). The sofa bed was comfy enough but unfortunately it had angled metal legs that stuck out, I managed to bang a toe one night and then a couple of nights later I managed to do it again but ended up getting a cut on the top of a toe which bled quite a bit. I ended up having to put a plaster (band-aid to my American readers) on it for a couple of days. We got breakfast at the hotel as part of our deal which again was basic but nice, I ended up having fried eggs and toast every day!  It was a fairly small hotel but it had a good sized pool area with the pool split across two levels, the higher part had a shallow pool and then the lower part had a much larger pool with a proper deep end. There were a good number of sun loungers and parasols but unfortunately after the second day my dad had to resort to getting up early and leaving our towels down to reserve sun loungers after we struggled to get any that day due to other people doing the same.

Due to the heat it ended up being a very lazy holiday, we  spent most days at the hotel at the pool. If it got too hot you could just go in the pool (though I can't just jump in as I have to take my remove my hearing aids first). There was a beach nearby and we had actually bought swim shoes as we had read online that it was a rocky beach but unfortunately it was 20 minutes walk away. After walking there one night before dinner to check it out we realised that it wasn't really worth trekking all the way there in the heat. We did go into the nearby village of Latsi one night for dinner, we went by bus, had a walk around, had dinner and then walked back to Polis along the boardwalk which took about an hour but it was dark by then and not as warm. We also went into the capital Paphos one day which required a journey by one bus and then another shorter journey down to the harbour. Unfortunately despite being beside the sea there was no sea breeze so it was extremely hot. We had a walk along the seafront and we came across a woman selling tickets for a boat tour where you are guaranteed  to see turtles which I would have loved to have gone on but unfortunately they didn't have any spaces left for that day. We decided to get some lunch but were put off by the over eager staff members trying to encourage us to come into their individual restaurants and we ended up going to a place where we thought we had eaten the last time we had been in Paphos but unfortunately both the food and the service was poor. Given the heat we decided to walk to a shopping centre (mall to my American readers) that we had seen on the way to the harbour. It was a good decision as it was air conditioned! It was lovely and modern and I even spent some money buying two t-shirts for a good price. That was about the sum of the excitement for the holiday but I didn't mind as it was meant to be a relaxing holiday. It hasn't been the best of summers in Northern Ireland so it was great to get a week away in the sun. It was around this time last year we were up the north coast including seeing the air show at Portrush but we already had a few days up there earlier in the summer so that is us for holidays for a while.

Me just before lunch in Paphos, see if you can spot my injured toe!

Thanks for reading,

James

Summer Time

So it is now over a year since I had my PhD graduation which seems pretty crazy. Unfortunately I still haven't managed to get a job yet and it is currently very quiet in terms of the jobs that are being advertised. Since my last post I've had one interview, I thought it went very well but unfortunately I didn't get it with the feedback implying that the person who did get it had more relevant experience. The employment adviser who I had been dealing with has left the organisation and so I decided to make a change and have switched to a new employment adviser at another organisation who I was very impressed with when we first met. As a result I have started using a new approach to interviews wherein I arrive and am able to type out my answers to the interview questions and then have a proper interview where the interviewers can refer to my answers in front of them. This is in the hope of reducing any issues of interviewers not understanding me or not getting everything that I say. It really has been a mixed bag in terms of interviews before with some interviewers having no problems whatsoever but others clearly struggling. There is the further issue of interviewers being afraid to admit that they don't understand me in case I'm offended. I'm currently waiting to hear back about a number of applications and I recently did another aptitude test which I'm waiting to hear how I've done on. I'm hoping that once the main holiday period is over in Northern Ireland that things will start to pick up again.

In other news I got my new BAHA and gave back the demo one unfortunately I had some issues with feedback but after going back to the hospital and getting the audiologist to have a look I think they have been fixed. There is a new update from Cochlear which means that my BAHAs are now in sync so if I change the program in one it automatically changes in the other and the same for muting them. I was able to get another accessory with the new BAHA so I decided to go with the phone clip and I'm very glad I did. The main point of it is that it connects to your phone using Bluetooth and sends any audio from your phone to your BAHA(s). You can clip it to your clothes and if you get a call you can answer it by pressing the button on the phone clip, it sends the call to your BAHA(s) and you speak into the microphone on the phone clip. Whilst I don't generally make or receive many phone calls this is great as normally I have to use speaker phone which doesn't offer any privacy and also because it is difficult holding a phone near your BAHA as it doesn't like things being close to it and gives off feedback. Since it sends any audio that is playing on the phone to your BAHA(s) you can use it to listen to music or watch videos etc. without disturbing anyone else and it means you don't have to have any wires. Whilst I did have to buy a memory card in order to put my music on my phone it has been great being able to listen to music when out and about and not have to carry my Ipod and the mini mic and an audio cable. The phone clip is also great as you can mute your BAHA(s) with the press of a button which is great because otherwise you have to either open the battery door(s) to turn them off which is risky in case something catches them or the battery falls out or load up the BAHA app, wait for it to connect to your BAHA(s) then tap the mute icon. You can also change the program by pressing the program change button on the phone clip which is more discreet and won't cause feedback like when you have to press the button on top of a BAHA. I won't be giving up the mini mic however since I still need it to connect to non-Bluetooth devices like my laptop and my electronic drum kit. I do understand the switch to Bluetooth away from FM systems that require specific receivers however I have noticed a bit of an issue with Bluetooth interfering with my WIFI connection. It seems when I try and use my mini mic with my electronic drum kit it interferes with my WIFI on my tablet making it very frustrating when I'm trying to play along to YouTube videos. I emailed Cochlear about it and they came back and said it was a known issue and suggested some ways to fix it but I may need to do some more experimenting. Maybe with the increased use of bluetooth devices in general companies will find a way to reduce the problem.

It's not all been job hunting and hearing aid stuff there have social activities as well! Last month I went down to Dublin with a friend to see Tame Impala live. They are a band that I really like with Currents being a fantastic album, the two new singles aren't bad either! I decided with some persuasion from my parents that it would be a lot of hassle driving down and back and also getting parked. We ended up booking a direct coach from a local company, got the bus at the pickup point in Belfast and it took us down to Dublin (with a few pickups along the way) and dropped us five minutes walk from the 3Arena. Unfortunately there was an issue on the way down to Dublin, the coach started to have problems and eventually the driver had to pull onto the hard shoulder and stop. Thankfully the company were able to send another coach but it was quite a long wait and it was a rather warm day! We got there a bit later than expected but we were able to get some food in Eddie Rockets just beside the 3Arena and we made it in to catch most of the support act. Tame Impala put on a spectacular show with the great music enhanced by the visuals, lights and lasers. My only criticism is that they could've played one or two more songs. I was disappointed they didn't play Reality in Motion. I was also glad of the ability to mute my hearing aids as it did seem rather loud, my friend was glad he had brought his ear plugs. After the show we went straight back to the bus which then took us back to Belfast. I then got an uber home (very handy being able to use an app rather than have to ring up a taxi). I also saw Slash live in Belfast and got in to the concert for free. The night before it emerged that they were giving tickets away for free presumably because they hadn't sold enough and didn't want to be embarrassed. It was a good night even though it rained heavily that said one of Slash's guitar solos went on way too long! As well as that I had a short break up the coast with my parents, it was only for a few days but it was nice to have a change of scene.

Thanks for reading, I will try and post more regularly!

James

Bilateral/Job Situation

Well I am now bilateral that is I now have a BAHA for each side of my head. I just have a demo unit for now but am hoping to get my own in the near future. I have definitely noticed an improvement in sound quality and I no longer have to worry about which side I have to sit or walk on in order to hear people. I have had a bit of issue with a metallic like feedback that just comes from the demo BAHA but I assume that the volume is just a bit too high on it.

In terms of other stuff it's been a bit up and down in terms of the job situation, there seem to be quiet periods were there are very few relevant jobs being advertised and other periods when I am spending lots of time preparing for interviews. Unfortunately I've still had no solid offers for jobs. It is very frustrating given that I am getting interviews, I feel the interviews go well (and I certainly have learnt a lot and am much more prepared than I was when I first started having interviews) and I am getting great feedback. Unfortunately in many cases the competition is so high and the feedback is that someone else had more direct experience.

I had applied for a job before Christmas and I was invited in for a chat about it, unfortunately I was later informed that I hadn't got it but that competition had been high with a total of 76 people applying for the single position, many of them with PhDs like me. During a quiet period when there were few jobs appearing and nothing much happening I decided to go back to the person and ask if there would be an opportunity to get some experience in the laboratory. The person very generously agreed and allowed me to come and spend two days in the lab. This was great as it allows me to show employers that I have been productive, it has given me recent lab experience and it has also given me experience of a commercial lab i.e. one outside of a university setting. The company are currently very busy but the person running it has generously offered for me to come in for a longer period at a later date and gain more experience. It shows that people are not all bad and it's certainly not a case of me working for free given that the person I was working with had to take time out of their own work schedule to show me how to carry out the complex process that they do on a daily basis.

I am currently waiting for feedback from two big interviews I did unfortunately it seems they are very quick to reject you but not so quick to provide feedback. It is very quiet in terms of jobs becoming available at the moment but I'm hoping that will change soon or I will hear back about some of the many jobs I've applied for in the past months (and am definitely qualified for!).

Thanks for reading,

James

Tiring

This is a bit of a follow on to my last post and I'm going to talk about how tiring it can be sometimes when you have a medical condition with hospital appointments and other things to think about. I am wary of making this blog too self-pitying but at the same time I want to be honest and share the difficulties that I and others like me face.

It is fair to say that trialing the BAHA and then switching to it full time has been tiring. It is tiring to go to an audiology appointment and get your hearing tested. You sit there with this headset on your head and have to press a button that you hold if you hear a beep. The problem is that when you are in that situation it is difficult to figure out if you are actually hearing a quiet beep or imagining it. It is also difficult when you think that there is a pattern to it so you think oh there must be a beep but you aren't 100% sure. It is also tiring to get information basically thrown at you and be asked questions about how the hearing aid is when you haven't had time to actually test it in your normal routines. You have to be prepared and have questions ready to go for appointments and you also have to make decisions in a short amount of time. It can also be tiring when you are dealing with multiple people (say an audiologist and a representative of the hearing aid company) in the same appointment. Having people go on at you about getting a BAHA implant and about how much better it is than the softband is especially tiring especially when they don't have any personal experience and it's not them that will be going through it.

Following on from this it can be tiring thinking about surgeries in general. I always have thoughts at the back of my mind about the possibility of surgeries and whether or not I would want to undergo any procedures. In the past I have doctors basically give me lists of things I could get done:

• Jaw surgery to bring my lower jaw forward
• Chin implants
• Cheekbone implants
• Surgery to give me normal looking ears
• Surgery to improve my airway
• Surgery to straighten my nose

There are probably others that I have forgotten. As an adult any decision I make will be my own responsibility, I can get advice from doctors and other people but in the end it will be me who has to live with the aftermath and that includes if things don't work out or something happens like nerve damage or something worse. I might expand on this in future posts but at the moment I'll just say that I'm happy with how things are but it's something I will always have at the back of my mind.

There is also the issue of having to keep on top of things such as taking care of your hearing aid, making sure you have enough batteries and making sure you have a backup aid especially when you go away on holiday. When I needed the Fortisip it became a case of having to bring the bottles in a coolbag and having a letter from a doctor explaining to the airport staff why I needed to bring all this liquid with me. As I mentioned previously I also had to make the effort to get an In Case of Emergency card made up and laminated as well as sending messages to friends to let them know about it for any worst case scenario where it might be needed.

All in all having these things to remember or having to go through hospital appointments where lots of information thrown at you can be quite tiring. That said I'm aware that other people likely have it worse and it is fortunate that now I'm older I don't have as many hospital appointments.

Thanks for reading,

James.

BAHA or nothing!

*I wrote this post before my audiology appointment but didn't publish it in time as such I've added comments in blue to show what I learnt from the appointment*

In a previous post I mentioned that I was trialing a Cochlear BAHA 5 after being told that Phonak would not be repairing the bone conductor hearing aid I had been wearing after 2020, unfortunately that wasn't the whole story. The whole story is that they would have only repaired it if they still had any of the required parts. I know this because my Phonak hearing aid broke and when the audiology department sent it away to be repaired Phonak just came back and said they weren't going to repair it as they didn't have the parts anymore. Fortunately I have adapted well to the BAHA on a soft band but I feel very sorry for people who are not able to this forced change especially older people who may struggle to adapt to an entirely new system with different controls and advanced functionality like only being able to change the volume on a phone app.

Thankfully it has become clear that I can definitely live with the BAHA 5 and it is not a downgrade in sound quality. That said there are some issues I'm still having though I may be able to tweak or fix some of these at my next appointment:

• Feedback, for some reason the BAHA 5 can't handle certain noises or frequencies that my much older hearing aids had no issue with. It mainly seems to be high pitches and I get feedback during certain moments when watching TV shows or hearing background music. I also have to turn the BAHA down when playing guitar but that doesn't fix the problem completely which is very frustrating.
  I brought this up in the appointment and the audiologist has added a music program onto the BAHA. It seems to take a few seconds to adjust but it seems to have fixed the issue in terms of playing guitar. I can now play both my acoustic and electric guitars without constant feedback or having to turn the BAHA itself way down.
• Wind, the microphone on the BAHA seems either to be more exposed or much more sensitive to wind than my old hearing aids. I need to see about getting the "wind" program put on it again but it didn't seem to make a massive difference when I had my first trial.
  The wind program has been added and seems to make a bit of a difference but I think it is unfortunately a downside that the BAHA is just going to be more sensitive to wind than my old aid.
• Battery life, this isn't a major issue and nothing you can do about it but it's definitely nowhere near as good as my old hearing aids and hopefully something that can be improved in future models especially for people like me to listen to music a lot through the mini mic accessory.
• Poor sound quality on the other side. With my old hearing aid the microphone was on the left side so I normally tried to walk on the right of people or sit on the right at dinner with my family. That said it seems like it is even more of an issue with the BAHA. I really struggle to hear people on my left side especially in a noisier environment. Obviously I can try and stay on the left of people now (the BAHA is all one bit and it's on my right side of my head now). There is also the option of getting bilateral BAHAs (one for each side of my head).
  After talking with the audiologist we are going to see about me getting a second BAHA so I can have one for either side of my head and also it would mean if one broke I wouldn't be without a backup. My audiologist did say that the BAHA is more directional than my old aid so it makes sense that there is more of a difference. Given that unlike many people who have BAHAs I'm don't just have Single Sided Deafness so it makes sense for me to have bilateral BAHAs.

I have my follow up appointment at the audiology department soon and will be able to speak with the representative from Cochlear about these issues. I will admit that I am more open to the idea of getting the actual implant for the BAHA and getting it done under local anesthetic but I would need to think a lot more about it and I would want to try the other brand-Oticon first before making that decision. I quite like being able to just completely take my hearing aid off and not have anything at night, I'm also a bit worried about having what essentially is an open wound especially with my sensitive skin and the reports of infections on the BAHA Facebook groups. That said like with most things you only hear the complaints, not all the people who have no issues.

The BAHA 5 does have some definite plus points over my old hearing aid:

• It is all contained in one unit, no longer have a unit either side of my head connected by a wire. So this means you can have bilateral BAHAs. The lack of a wire is also good because I always seemed to have an issue with either sweat or moisture (despite drying my hair very thoroughly) which resulted in the wire turning a lovely green colour due to a discharge from the hearing aid (presumably harmless, never had any issues and the audiologist and Phonak never made any comments about it when they looked at it).
• I got the Mini Mic 2+ accessory with it and it has the advantage of being a lot smaller than the FM system I used with my digital Phonak hearing aid. It connects to the BAHA via bluetooth and the sound quality seems very good, you can also change the volume on the mini mic itself. I don't need to use it as a microphone but I connect audio devices (Ipod, laptop etc.) to it using a standard audio cable and it works very well. My one criticism of it is that for whatever reason they designed it so that it has a flashing power light which is very irritating if it is in your eye line.
• If you have an IPhone you can stream audio directly to the BAHA without any accessories including phone calls. I really hope that we get this functionality with Android phones at some point. Obviously you can use speaker phone but the BAHA doesn't like things being held close to it and it results in feedback.

My BAHA, showing the underside and the part that attaches

The elasticated headband, the round bit is where the BAHA attaches, the cream coloured clip comes apart to prevent it choking a child

The BAHA attached to the headband

This shows my four programs in the phone app:

1. Normal everyday program
2. Outdoor with wind noise reduction
3. Music program
4. Audio streaming program

Here you can see the settings for the streaming program so I can mute the BAHA microphone and only have the audio from my Ipod etc. come through

Another menu page in the app

The mini mic with the standard audio cable I use with it

Plenty to think about!

Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse review

I've realised that I haven't done a proper movie review in a while so I've decided to do a review of the recent Spider-Man animated movie.

It's fair to say that I was skeptical when this movie was announced, it was difficult not to feel that this was yet another poor decision by Sony motivated by greed and likely to take away from the live action Spider-Man movies. Despite Spider-Man: Homecoming setting up the potential appearance of Miles Morales this animated movie would now be the big screen debut of the Miles Morales Spider-Man. Whilst I do think Sony have a lot to answer for such as pushing forward with their Spider-Man spin-off universe (Venom being one) which although not connected to the MCU they keep teasing that it is and keep teasing the appearance of Spider-Man which very unlikely. There is also the problem of Spider-Man: Far From Home which releases in July, it's hard not to suspect that if were soley up to Marvel that it wouldn't be being released so soon after Avengers: Endgame, in fact it is already causing problems with the trailer having been released before Avengers: Endgame is actually out (it doesn't give away any major spoilers for that film but it is a problem).

Putting all of that aside I'm glad to say that I was wrong to be skeptical about this movie, it is both a very good movie and one of the best Spider-Man movies we have had. It is set in a world where Peter Parker's Spider-Man has been around for quite a while and is very well known. However the movie doesn't follow him, instead it follows a young Miles Morales, a teenager who is dealing with the challenge of moving to a new school and trying to fit in only to get bitten by a radioactive spider and gain powers of his own. He has to try and learn to use his abilities and become a hero whilst teaming up with other Spider heroes from across the multiverse to stop a major threat.

Miles Morales

It's a great looking film and the fact that it is animated means they can do stuff that wouldn't work in live action. It is very comic booky (if that makes sense) at times and each of the Spider heroes has a unique style befitting their universe. Some of the characters look a bit over the top but it doesn't detract from them too much. The action looks great and there are some fantastic fight scenes as well as awesome little touches if you are paying attention. There is one weird thing in terms of the look of the movie with some of the background having the appearance of a 3D movie if you aren't wearing 3D glasses, I only really noticed it early on in movie though.

The voice acting is definitely well-done, Nicholas Cage somewhat steals the show as Spider-Man Noir, a vigilante Spider-Man who comes from an old fashioned black and white universe. I wasn't overly fussed on Spider-Ham when I saw the trailer but thankfully he isn't too irritating. Shameik Moore is great as Miles and has a lot of great back and forth with Jake Johnson's world weary Peter Parker. The sound is also well done and helps to make The Prowler a seriously intimidating villain.

Spider-Man Noir

 It is a genuinely funny movie at times, there is plenty of slap-stick humour to keep the kids happy as well as lots of moments to entertain adults as well including one sequence which had two of my favourite comedy moments in the movie. The use of multiple Spider heroes provides a lot of potential for comedy and given the post-credits sequence there is potential for a lot more in any sequels.

Overall I'm very glad I decided to go and see this movie in the cinema, I ended up seeing it in early January in the early afternoon and it was only me and another man and his young son in the screen. It is a great looking, action-packed, funny and heart-felt movie. It's clear that a lot of effort and love went into this movie and I would definitely be interested in going and seeing a sequel.

Thanks for reading.

A New Year

Well Christmas and the New Year celebrations are now over and we are back in normal routines. For me that means I'm back on the job hunt again though I had to keep on top of my automatic job alert emails during Christmas so they didn't pile up. It is a quiet period on the job front but that is expected after the holidays. It was nice to not have to think about jobs and other things over the holidays too much. We had a nice mixture of relaxation, spending time with family and various excursions including my first trip up Cave Hill which overlooks Belfast as well as the area around where I live despite me having lived fairly close to it all my life. Christmas Day was very nice, as always I was spoilt by my parents and my brother but I think everyone was happy with what they received. We visited family members on the day and were very entertained by my cousins very hyper puppy. We had a lovely Christmas dinner just the four of us before having a relaxing night to ourselves. For New Year we never really do anything exciting, my brother was away so I just had a quiet night in with my parents.

Views from Cave Hill

For Christmas I got various different presents including a nice leather guitar strap which has been great for me as it a bit more padded and more comfortable than the seat belt style strap that I had been using as well as a multiple photo frame for my bedroom wall. I had also treated myself to a Nintendo Switch having gotten a great deal on Black Friday. I had resisted opening it until Christmas helped by the fact I was playing through God of War on the PS4 (great game!). I had gotten Mario Kart with it and I also received Mario Odyssey for Christmas. I'm really enjoying it especially the hybrid nature of it being able to play it on the TV or take the console out and play it as a handheld.

With the beginning of a new year it's hard not to think that time is flying by but at the same time it seems like a long time since the major events. 2018 was a bit of a strange year for me, after spending most of December 2017 waiting for my suggested revisions for my PhD thesis to be sent to me I finally got them at the start of January. Having submitted the thesis the first time, then having to defend it, going back to make changes to it including changes to the appearance, reference list etc. is frustrating. I spent the period from January to the middle of March working on it and it was difficult due to the examiner asking for things that weren't necessary or in some cases weren't even possible and he was very poor at responding to emails. It was also very frustrating working on such a large document in Microsoft Word when formatting what should be simple things becomes very difficult like having two images of the same size with captions on a number of pages like I had. I was finally happy with it and I submitted to my examiner only to have to wait until the middle of April to get it signed off. By this time I had started properly applying for jobs and learnt some harsh lessons about not even being invited to interview despite being qualified for a job.

With my thesis finally signed off I made my final checks before getting it printed and hardbound and submitting it to the university as well as the organisation who funded my PhD. My job search became my main focus although I've tried to also enjoy my free time while I can. I started meeting up with an employment advisor from a hearing loss charity and ended up working to improve my interview technique. I ended up having quite a few interviews in some cases I had two interviews on the one day but unfortunately didn't receive any offers despite thinking that certain interviews had gone rather well.

It wasn't all about the job hunt though, we had the excitement of our trip to London, having our original flight cancelled, then having to fly to Southampton and get a taxi to London with the surreal experience of arriving in a snow covered London late at night. 2018 was the year of my first music festival which I really enjoyed. We also had our holiday to Majorca which was lovely and two trips to the north coast although as my last post mentioned it was a rather mixed trip due to the loss of our cat Milo. There was also the disappointment of Northern Ireland's Nations League campaign but at least they showed that they can play well they just need to put the ball in the net!

One minor achievement I had this year was finally switching to a solid breakfast, no longer relying on the Fortisip drink, in fact the last time I actually had a Fortisip was when I took one with me to the music festival in August. I no longer get Fortisip on prescription and hopefully I won't ever feel the need to get it again. I try to go out for a walk every day as well as playing five a side football once a week (if we can get the numbers) as well as being a volunteer dog walker for two hours a week all of which means I feel pretty good physically though things may slip once I'm in full time employment.

My main hope for 2019 is for me to get a good job, I think once I get a job then that will open up other opportunities but that is not always the case. I imagine I will continue to deal with the BAHA issue and explore my options in terms of model and whether or not I would consider the surgery. One of my closest friends is getting married this year so i am looking forward to that and of course I am looking forward to seeing Captain Marvel and Avengers Endgame which is meant to be the end of an era for the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Thanks for reading!

2018 movies (plus The Last Jedi and Justice League)

I have realised that it's been a while since I've really talked about movies or TV shows. I saw something on twitter today about how it's been a year since Star Wars The Last Jedi came out so I'll talk about it as well as the various superhero movies that have come out this year.

*I will be vague and try not to spoil anything.

I'm not sure if there has been a movie with so much hyperbole of opinion around it as The Last Jedi. There seems to be this idea that either you think it is awful or you think it is the best Star Wars movie ever but I imagine there are many people like myself who thought it was a mixed bag. It doesn't help that it starts off in a confusing way when you think about how The Force Awakens ended. To that some might say well the books explain what happened between that and The Last Jedi to which I would say well you shouldn't have to read the books to understand why things are the way they are. There is also the issue of how Luke Skywalker is handled with Mark Hamill himself coming out and saying he didn't agree with his characterization in this movie (that said he didn't let that affect his performance so fair play to him). That and how new characters who were great in The Force Awakens are not handled that well in this movie don't help things. It does have some exceptional moments and I do understand that Rian Johnson wanted to subvert expectations and breathe new life into Star Wars that said I think I enjoyed The Force Awakens more.

I now realise as I'm writing this that I haven't commented on Justice League yet. Going to see it was actually my first trip out after getting my wisdom tooth out last year.  Whilst Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice made me angry and frustrated and Suicide Squad was disappointing despite low expectations Justice League was just medicore. I'll say that again, Justice League the first live action Justice League movie where we see heroes such as Superman, Batman, The Flash, Cyborg, Aquaman and Wonder Woman  team up was mediocre (at best). Zach Snyder stepped away from the movie due to a personal tragedy and the director of Avengers and Avengers Age of Ultron was brought in to finish the movie. It is fair to say that the movie is a bit of a mess with lame comedy bits added, this weird focus on a Russian family that the movie keeps cutting to and an unfinished, poor quality CGI finale. It once again shows the very poor decision making that goes on at Warner Bros in terms of their DC Extended Universe. There has been much campaigning by fans of Zach Snyder for a "Snyder-cut" of the movie and as much as I think Batman V Superman was a bad movie at least it was ambitious and it was clearly setting stuff up for Justice League which was then not included. It's hard not to wonder if the original vision would've been better.

The movie was't helped by moustache-gate

Before I talk about Marvel movies I'll talk about some other superhero movies that were released this year. The first Deadpool was a great movie and it showed that Fox could differentiate themselves from Marvel Studios by making more mature (aka violent) superhero movies. It was funny and had great action and it deservedly got a lot of praise. Unfortunately I didn't enjoy Deadpool 2 anywhere near as much. I don't think it was as funny, there were too many jokes relating to the Marvel Cinematic Universe and I thought it really dragged in places. It's not awful but definitely could've been better. I wasn't overly fussed on Josh Brolin as Cable or his backstory in the movie but I would be interested in seeing an X-Force movie with him and Deadpool having a smaller role.

The first Incredibles movie was released in 2004 and I think it's fair to say that it remains one of the best superhero movies. The sequel was finally released in 2018 and it was hard to know if it would meet expectations. I must confess I saw it late in its run at the cinema, I went in the afternoon expecting there not to be many people at it only to find lots of parents and their kids so I maybe didn't enjoy it as much I might've if there weren't kids stomping up and down. It definitely looks great, the voice acting is spot-on and it has some great set-pieces. That said I don't think it reaches the quality of the first movie and I don't think the villain is anywhere near as good as the villain in the first one.

2018 was a big year for the Marvel Cinematic Universe. The first movie being Black Panther, a big budget blockbuster movie that is culturally important for having a primarily black cast. T'Challa/Black Panther had been introduced in Captain America: Civil War and despite his small screen time he came across as a very interesting and badass character. I enjoyed this movie, it's yet another polished, entertaining Marvel Cinematic Universe movie, it doesn't just feel like another generic superhero movie. That said I don't think it is perfect and I think it is overhyped a bit especially given the finale which I thought could've been better especially with the poor CGI (possibly due to priority being given to Avengers: Infinity War).

Avengers; Infinity War had a lot of pressure to live up to. This is due to it not only being an Avengers movie, being directed by the Russo brothers who directed Captain America: The Winter Solider and Civil War, being a movie featuring not just the Avengers but also other characters such as Black Panther, Spider-man, Doctor Strange and also the Guardians of the Galaxy but also finally having Thanos, a villain who had been teased since the post-credit scene of the first Avengers movie finally take center stage.  Whilst not spoiling anything I think it is fair to say that it managed to both meet and exceed expectation. It is action packed, it is funny, it has twist and turns and covers a lot of different emotions. It is a great looking and sounding film as well. Josh Brolin is fantastic as Thanos and he comes across as a real character with real weight to him despite all the CGI and motion capture used to bring him to life. Seeing it in the cinema for the first time is an experience that I will remember for a long time.

How you do a CGI villain cough*Stepphenwolf*cough

Ant-man and The Wasp was the next film in the Marvel Cinematic Universe and in a way acted as a bit of a palette cleanser before Captain Marvel next March. Like the first one it is a self-contained story and is better for it. Again it is a very polished entertaining Marvel movie. It has an interesting antagonist and lots of great choreography and action. It's not going to top many people's favourite MCU movies but that is fine. Paul Rudd is proof of the brilliance of the casting of the MCU and Evangeline Lilly gets to step up and does very well. I think if there is anything to complain about is that it does juggle different baddies and plot-lines. It might have been better if one element of the plot had been given a bit more focus and time but it may be that it is revisited in future movies.

I cannot review Solo: A Star Wars Story, as I haven't seen it, nor have I seen Venom (partly out of protest due to Sony being so short-sighted and going ahead with their Spider-man spin-off universe that isn't connected to the MCU). There are a number of big movies out now that I haven't seen yet, hopefully I will be able to see at least one of them before Christmas now things are winding down a bit in terms of my job hunt.

If I don't write anything before then well please have a Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year!

• 
  

I'm starting to really dislike November

Well it has been another large gap between updates, I'm not even sure how many people actually regularly check my blog, it would help if blogger would remember not to track my own page views. I've been rather busy on the job search front. Applying for lots of different jobs and having a number of different interviews. Unfortunately I'm still looking which is frustrating because I definitely think my interview's have improved and I am actually giving longer answers now instead of just answering the question and stopping. I've had some great feedback but it's hard not to wonder if it is a numbers game with a lot of people all applying for the same position. It has also been frustrating when companies recruitment processes aren't the best. You can apply for a job, get an interview, get a rejection and get told someone else gave a better interview only to see the same job advertised again weeks later.  In a recent case I haven't even heard back after my interview but the company are seemingly advertising the job again, this when I felt I definitely met the criteria and gave a solid interview. All of that said I know I am very lucky that I'm able to live with my parents and don't have to worry about money for food etc.

All in all it had been a rather busy few weeks with interviews etc. but we had planned a short break away up the north coast again coinciding with the Atlantic Sessions which is what we did last year. I was hopeful that this year would be a lot more enjoyable due to me being in a much better place ( see my post from that time) and that we were staying in the lovely apartment we had stayed in on our last break up the north coast. We planned that me and my parents would go up on the Thursday and my brother would join us on the Friday. We had tickets for gigs on the Friday night as well as a gig on the Saturday night and we planned to come back on the Sunday before heading to the Northern Ireland V Austria match on Sunday evening.

Unfortunately it turned out to be a rather mixed weekend. Our cat Milo who hadn't really been eating well for a while which was rather unusual for him (we had taken him to the vet who couldn't find anything obvious) but who we thought had been improving disappeared on Wednesday night. He hadn't quite been himself for a while but we thought he had maybe had a bug and was taking a bit of time to get over it. This led to a stressful night worrying that if he didn't come back we would have to cancel the trip as we couldn't leave him to come back to an empty house. Thankfully he did come back at 6am and seemed rather perky on it. We took him to the cattery and let the owner who is a lovely woman know about Milo's situation. She promised to keep an eye on him and said she would check his teeth in case that was the issue. Thursday was nice and Friday was a lovely day. Unfortunately on Friday evening we got a phone call from the owner of the cattery saying she was concerned about Milo (also that she couldn't see any issue with his teeth) and asked if it would be ok if she took him to the vet in the morning, we said yes and went out to the gigs. When we got back we had missed calls from her to say she really wasn't happy and she had taken him to our vet (who she trusted and who we have known for a long time) that night. We got a message from the vet saying that he had put Milo on a drip and would ring us in the morning. This led to another very restless night and in the morning we got the call from the vet saying he would rather speak to us in person. At this point we pretty much knew that things were really not good.

On Saturday morning we drove the long journey home and went to the vet's. He explained that Milo's rapid weight loss along with lumps he had found meant that he most likely had lymphoma which is common in cats. He explained that whilst we could prolong things with chemotherapy and steroid pills it would only be for a matter of months. We all agreed that we didn't want to put Milo through that and the best thing would be to do would be to ease his suffering. I am extremely grateful that we were able to see Milo and say goodbye to him. He clearly recognised us and was happy to see us. The whole thing was very calm and peaceful and Milo wasn't stressed at all. It's hard not to think that it would be kinder in some instances if we could do the same for humans.

It's fair to say that it was a very sad day for our family, Milo had turned up on our door as a stray kitten and adopted us as his family (we put found posters up but nobody responded). He was with us for over fourteen years and acted as a constant source of comfort and entertainment. He saw me through almost all of high school and all of university and my PhD and the time after, It is fair to say he became the fifth member of our family. Despite how upset we were unfortunately life is always moving on. Given that we were paying for the apartment and had tickets for the gig that night as well as the Northern Ireland match the next day we felt that it was better to continue as planned rather than go home and sit about being miserable. We weren't really in the mood however we had a nice meal on Saturday night and the music was good even if the venue/the many people not interested in the music were not. The Northern Ireland match ended up being very disappointing, despite how well they have played in the Nations League they had failed to get any points. We hoped that we could rescue some pride against Austria. They managed to come back from 1-0 down only to lose by conceding a goal at the very end of the match.

Last week was tough, Milo was such a big presence in our home and the most regular topic of conversation would be him. It has been difficult not to look for him in his regular spots both outside and inside the house. We miss him terribly but are trying to remember all the great times we had with him. Our neighbours who knew him have been sympathetic but not everyone is. I pity people who don't know the joy of having a pet or those who dismiss cats due to silly stereotypes. We were very fortunate that we had fourteen wonderful years with Milo. Before him we had two beagles who lived to fourteen and around fifteen and a half. We are an animal loving family and it is likely that in the future we will get another pet however it will not be for a while yet. I believe you need to take the proper time to grieve and to process things, I don't understand the people who lose a pet only to immediately get another one.

Me and Milo on the day of my PhD graduation

Sorry for not writing the most uplifting post but thanks for reading, I'm meant to be getting my BAHA on a soft band this week so I will probably write about that at some point.

Trials, interviews and some changes

Hello again, yes I am still alive, just haven't been in the mood to sit down and write a blog piece. Since the last update I've been on holiday for a week up the north coast of Northern Ireland with my parents, had a few more job interviews, been doing some more decorating and getting my new bedroom ready as well as starting to trial a BAHA (bone anchored hearing aid) on a soft band.

It was great to get away for a week with my parents obviously we had been away to Majorca but that was only for a week and at the start of the summer.  The north coast of Northern Ireland is very hard to beat especially for the scenery and the food! We rented an apartment in Portstewart which was lovely, plenty of room, very comfy and with great sea views. We did a lot of walking and visited Rathlin Island for the very first time. We had timed it so we could also see the air show that was so great last year unfortunately bad weather elsewhere meant there were a lot less planes and helicopters this year.

View from the apartment

View from Rathlin Island

View from RSPB centre on Rathlin

The famous Dark Hedges as featured on Game of Thrones!

On the job front I have been busy and have had a number of interviews which is reassuring but unfortunately no offers yet. It is unfortunate that it seems to be a numbers game with so many people applying for the same positions. Due to some issues with interviews I have decided to not only send a strap line explaining that I have TCS if I'm invited to interview but also arrange for my employment advisor to ring the person just so he can also explain things. This way nobody is taken by surprise and the person is fully informed it also hopefully prevents the situation of people either not reading or not properly reading/understanding the email.

I have finally been able to move into my new larger bedroom, there are still some things to get such as a light shade for the ceiling light but it is now habitable. We had real issues getting the carpet sorted but eventually got one ordered that was in stock and ready to be fitted and I'm very happy with it. One of the main advantages of my larger room is that I was able to move my electronic drum kit out of the garage which gets very cold in winter and is a bit depressing in the dark. I now have a music corner of the room with my drum kit, my guitars, my amp and my effects pedalboard all set up. I will share some pictures once I get everything moved in and the way I want it.

If that wasn't all enough to keep me busy I am also currently trialing a BAHA on a soft band. I haven't had any reason to visit the audiology department at the hospital where I went quite regularly as a kid but my mum thought it would be a good idea just to check that what I currently have is the best option for me and thought now was a good time to check it out given I'm not currently working. Long story short we have been informed that Phonak are not going to repair/service my current bone conductor hearing aid after 2020. It is somewhat ironic after my quite contentious debates with people on Facebook about BAHAs being a bit overrated that I may now have to switch to one. I do stand by my point that you shouldn't need to have surgery to have a good hearing aid and it is my opinion that a lot of the people so strongly defending BAHAs online do so because their only experience of bone conductor/behind the ear hearing aids is from years ago with big bulky, uncomfortable and not very good models.

I have been allowed to trial the Cochlear BAHA 5 which is their most recent model and meant to be very fancy. I definitely could live with it if I had to and there are not the major teething problems I had when switching from my analog to digital bone conductor hearing aid (due to all the unnecessary programs and stuff that was on it at first). However the BAHA 5 does have issues:

• Very sensitive to the touch/wind. Cannot press on it to hear slightly better (during very quiet dialogue on tv) due to the feedback
• Automatic volume reduction programme, no rhyme or reason to it, looking forward to getting this deactivated to see how better it is. Not sure if this is why it is difficult for me to hear in shops unless the person is close to the side of the mic
• Doesn't like some high pitches of sound which is a bit awkward when playing guitar, have been told it might be due to the volume reduction

I'm going back for a follow up appointment next week so hopefully will get some of these issues resolved. Also hoping to try it with some of the accessories to listen to music/connect to audio devices (like my drum kit) as that is very important to me. 

Thanks for reading!

My first music festival

Well last weekend I attended my first proper music festival i.e. not a one day festival where you get to go home at the end of the day. I attended a local music festival called Stendhal Festival which is set in Limavady (Northern Ireland). I had come close to attending before especially last year but ended up not being fussed on the idea of camping especially last year when I was in the middle of writing up my PhD thesis. It's been running for a number of years now and has a very good reputation as being a great local music festival that caters to those of all ages. It has musical acts, comedy acts and plenty of things for kids to do including workshops and other fun activities.

I went with my brother and our mutual friend, me and my brother left on Friday morning and had to battle the Belfast traffic to pick up our friend then we had a long drive to Limavady, It wasn't the most reassuring drive as we drove through periods of very heavy rain. Thankfully we arrived in the sunshine and were able to get our tent set up. We were eager to get into the main site and start enjoying the festival and we were able to start with the wonderful Malojian. I really love his music but hadn't had the pleasure of seeing him live. It was a lovely way to start my first Stendhal, By the way I definitely recommend watching a documentary about how he went to Chicago to record an album with the famous Steve Albini.

The rest of the Friday was good, I saw the Ulster Orchestra play with a number of different female artists, saw Hunkpapa (unfortunately their set was cut short) and saw Jealous Of The Birds among other acts. Me and my brother had very nice pizza for dinner. Unfortunately the Friday night was rather cold especially if you were wearing welly boots which have no insulation! It did stay dry but a number of the stages were under cover anyway. It was rather late by the time we were heading back to the tent but I slept surprisingly well.  I had bought a "self-inflating" mattress for £10 which worked quite well, I was also prepared and had brought a plastic lunch box to keep my hearing aid and my glasses in whilst I was sleeping. I probably slept better than my brother and our friend given that I couldn't hear most of the noise from the campsite!

Joshua Burnside was last on the bill on Friday night:

We got up on Saturday morning to glorious sunshine and I even put sun cream on the back of my neck just in case (probably should've put it on my face as well given I ended up somehow getting sunburnt despite the rest of the day not actually being that sunny!). I had a sausage bap for breakfast and then we started the day with the wonderful Glass Wings. The rest of the day I was all over the site at all the different stages not just for music but for a live comedy podcast as well as comedians as well. Highlights of the second day were Runabay, Rebekah Fitch, Hand Models and also Cormac Neeson of the The Answer with his side project. He and his band played on a small stage in the woods and it was such a great set. Embrace were the headliners on Saturday night, I like their old stuff but when the rain was pouring down and they are faffing about with an out of tune guitar and asking us to wish their tour manager or whatever happy birthday it didn't do much for me. We ended up going over to catch a bit of Brand New Friend who are definitely making waves now before going up to the other end of the site to catch the always fantastic Wood Burning Savages.

The weather had turned on Saturday evening and we ended up making the decision to pack up our tent and everything else and leave it back in the car. It meant that since we weren't that fussed on the band that were closing the festival we could leave slightly early and sleep in beds with a roof over our heads rather than a tent in the pouring rain (and then have to pack up a wet tent as well). Overall I really enjoyed my first festival experience. Obviously I was tired after it but it had helped that the weather had been so nice and we had been able to sit on the grass to enjoy quite a few of the acts. Not sure if  I would enjoy it as much if it rains for two days straight. I would definitely consider going back next year and now I have done it once I know a lot better what to expect and what I need to bring and what I definitely don't need to bring.

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